university

I’ve never actually felt like an undergraduate even though I’m about getting in to my fourth year of medical school. It does feel like yesterday, when I filled my applications, it feels too soon that I’d be here already but that’s not the reason why I still do not possess this feeling of being an undergraduate.
I never actually understood why it was this way, until yesterday, when it hit me. All my days in university of Lagos have been like a rat race. A race to avoid eviction. A race in which no one is deemed good enough. The ones that carry last are shown the way out. And so nobody actually gets to feel in.
It’s not like this in other courses, where the worst case scenario is a carry over, which can be avoided with doubled efforts. In college of medicine university of Lagos or medilag as we call it, doubled efforts are just the beginnings. Double efforts count for little. With triple efforts you barely manage to pass.
With triple efforts, you stand too close to the door, staring at eviction. Of course by eviction I mean being kicked out of med school. Being told you we’re not good enough even after burning the candle at two ends or more. Quadruple your efforts and you might, (emphasis on might) just be sure of a pass, nothing more, though it could be less.
In all of this one never really feels like he already is in the system. there’s a constant need to fight to keep your place from the ten persons statistically waiting to occupy it. To think that I would have been months close to getting my first degree, should I have gone for a four year course, hurts even more. Instead I have to wait another three years and some, to be a certified medic.